7 Ways to Empower Women During the #MeToo Movement

/ Rape, Resources, Sexual Abuse / Comments Off on 7 Ways to Empower Women During the #MeToo Movement

Every 98 seconds, an American experiences sexual assault. Raped my freshman year of college, I joined the 321,500 victims (age 12 or older) who experience rape and sexual assault each year in the United States. As a victim of sexual abuse, I joined the many women who spoke out in the #MeToo movement.

After last October, when the #MeToo movement went viral, I posted on Facebook and Twitter. It felt empowering to think—others struggle too. This wasn’t the first time I posted online for the whole world to see about my abuse. I’m a blogger who often writes about my abuse. But for the first time, others joined me in speaking out. Friends I had known for years, speaking out for the first time. Friends I could connect with and share how Jesus had healed me from the emotional destruction of sexual abuse. However, #MeToo has created more than cathartic relief. (more…)

Marriage: Surrendering our fears and entering into a partnership | Guest Post on FATHOM Mag

/ Love, Marriage, My Guest Posts / Comments Off on Marriage: Surrendering our fears and entering into a partnership | Guest Post on FATHOM Mag

Thousands of online forums overflow with people asking if they should date and marry cancer survivors. Misconceptions and social stigma force people to reject cancer survivors as possible spouses. My husband Zack shared with me that during his junior year of college, girls would express interest in dating him, but when they found out he previously had cancer, that interest evaporated. Imagine living through a life-threatening illness to then have your heart broken because of the memory of it. But I’m glad. My gain.

These kinds of studies point out an interesting fact about how our culture defines marriage. We place marriage in the category labeled “self-fulfillment.” The question we should ask ourselves is do we believe that God created marriage for our personal gain? If so, then yes, you should bolt from any cancer survivors.

Keep reading at Fathom Mag.

How to Stay Married for 50 Years

/ Inspiration, Love, Marriage, Your Story / Comments Off on How to Stay Married for 50 Years

Unsurprisingly, many marriages end in divorce. When we hear about a couple that has been married for fifty years, we are shocked. What if this changed? What if divorce surprised us? What if being married fifty years was the norm?

Meet Dale and Carol. Dale and Carol recently celebrated fifty years of marriage. Send them some congratulations in the comments below! (more…)

I married a Cancer Survivor | Guest Post on Boundless.org

/ Christian Dating, Love, Marriage, My Guest Posts, Singleness & Dating / Comments Off on I married a Cancer Survivor | Guest Post on Boundless.org

On May 27, 2017, I married my husband, Zack Skarka. I knew he had survived cancer, but I had no doubts in my decision to marry him. Check out my story on the Boundless Blog about trusting God with our fears. Love, Joy

“Run. Bolt before he dies and leaves you heartbroken.” That’s what a friend said when I told her about the cancer-surviving man I had met in the elevator.

Just days before this conversation, this man and I had become Facebook friends. While scrolling through his profile pictures, I paused — I saw a white sash draped over his shoulder. Not any white sash, but one that read “survivor.” That cute boy I met in the elevator had survived cancer.

Maybe I should run now while I have the chance. (more…)

Married and Experiencing Pain During Sexual Intercourse?

/ Freedom From Sexual Sin & Shame, Healing, Marriage, My Guest Posts, Your Story / Comments Off on Married and Experiencing Pain During Sexual Intercourse?

Having Painful Sex Emotional healing from naïve expectations

Experiencing sexual pain during intercourse? You are not alone.  Nearly three out of four women have pain during intercourse at some time during their lives. For some women, the pain lasts only for a time; for twenty to fifty percent of these women, the pain remains over time.

My story includes sexual pain. I share my story FIRST to give women the gift of going SECOND. I share my story to bring women FREEDOM.

Check out my new article on Fathom Mag, “Having Painful Sex: Emotional healing from naïve expectations.”

(more…)

3 Bible Verses for Healing from Sexual Shame

/ Bible Study, Freedom From Sexual Sin & Shame, Healing, Pornography, Rape, Sexual Abuse, Sexual Addiction / 4 Comments

With a past filled with sexual abuse, promiscuity, and an unhealthy sex education, I lacked a healthy view of sexuality. The biggest lie that I believed was that I was sexually broken.

My view of sex was far from the truth that God promises in His love letter. I had two distorted and conflicting views of sex:

  1. My experiences taught me that sex is bad and shameful.
  2. The movies taught me that sex is the best thing this world has to offer.

(more…)

When God Uses Broken People

/ Your Story / 2 Comments

Is there hope that God will use broken people for his glory? Matthew West believes God uses broken people. Do you? Do you believe God will use you and your brokenness for His glory?

What does it mean to bring God glory? When God uses your brokenness, other people will see God through your life story and you get to give God the credit for your life change. Would I have ever been able to find freedom from sexual abuse without God? No. Would I have found freedom from sexual addiction? No. This freedom is from God. My story of freedom only exists because of God’s work in my life. When I share my brokenness, when I share my story with others, God gets the glory. God gets the credit. He is the one that did the good work in me. (more…)

Will my husband forgive me for my sexual past?

/ Freedom From Sexual Sin & Shame, Grace, Marriage, Pornography, Sexual Addiction, Singleness, Singleness & Dating / 3 Comments

With tears in her eyes, hesitating to ask, she whispered, “Will my future husband still love and forgive me?” My new friend had a fear common to women who have found freedom from sexual sin. Jesus freed her from the chains of pornography, but currently she was gripped by the chains of fear. Have you had this fear or other fears about your future spouse and marriage because of your sexual past? (more…)

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