Christian Dating – Joy Skarka

Single or Dating? This blog is for you!

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Sometimes the red flags are big and waving high, and sometimes they are hidden under the surface and will only be discovered over time. I encourage you to pay attention to them, no matter how small they may seem. Desiring to be fully known and fully loved in marriage is a good thing. This is a God-given desire! But small behaviors are indicative of larger behavioral patterns, and ignoring these red flags could be costly in the long run.

Check out the post, Six Red Flags You Can’t Ignore In Dating on Authentic Intimacy!

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Porn, Dating And The Gospel

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Porn is a sensitive subject in the context of dating, but it’s something we can’t ignore. Sin retains its power when it stays a secret. It loses it in the light of the gospel.

That’s why I’m excited to share a conversation I had with Dating at a Distance about pornography and dating.

In the blog, I will share my story about finding freedom from sexual brokenness, as well as:

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Before You Send That Photo: 5 Good Reasons Not To Sext

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Sexting or sending photos in a long-distance relationship can be a real temptation.

And if your boyfriend is asking you to send something, you may not be sure how to respond. Check out the guest blog post I wrote on Dating at a Distance.

Why should you pause before you send that photo? I offers these five reasons for thinking twice before sexting.

1. Your boyfriend may not be the only one who sees it.

“Because of the world we live in with technology…it could just easily be sent to someone else. Even if you break up and something happens, it’s just a risky thing to do.”

“Even right now with my husband, we still don’t sext or send pictures to each other just because of the fear of, ‘What if our phones get hacked?’”

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I married a Cancer Survivor | Guest Post on Boundless.org

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On May 27, 2017, I married my husband, Zack Skarka. I knew he had survived cancer, but I had no doubts in my decision to marry him. Check out my story on the Boundless Blog about trusting God with our fears. Love, Joy

“Run. Bolt before he dies and leaves you heartbroken.” That’s what a friend said when I told her about the cancer-surviving man I had met in the elevator.

Just days before this conversation, this man and I had become Facebook friends. While scrolling through his profile pictures, I paused — I saw a white sash draped over his shoulder. Not any white sash, but one that read “survivor.” That cute boy I met in the elevator had survived cancer.

Maybe I should run now while I have the chance. (more…)

Christian Dating | How Far is Too Far Sexually?

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How far can my boyfriend and I go physically before it becomes a sin?

Christians ask this question all the time, so if you are asking this, you are not alone. You are normal and your desires are normal. Being physically attracted to your significant other is a good thing. If you weren’t physically attracted, I would recommend you break up. Our challenge then becomes, what do we do with these desires?

Our churches are filled with conflicting beliefs. Some Christians believe kissing is okay. Others argue you shouldn’t kiss until your wedding day. Some Christians think that everything but vaginal sex is okay. Others argue that sex includes more than vaginal sex. What do we do with these contradictions?

In this post, I will answer ‘How Far is Too Far,’ share some personal stories, and provide some practical tips to live out purity in dating. (more…)

Not Even a Ring Can Fully Satisfy

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I recently got engaged to a godly Christian man. Let me share with you our proposal story. Zack and I were back at his apartment after a night of two-stepping. That morning I had landed in Dallas after being away for a few weeks. When I got home from the airport Zack had given me roses and showed me a puzzle that he completed as a surprise.

Zack knows I love puzzles. In fact, growing up my Dad called me the Puzzle Queen. Months before Zack proposed, Zack had ordered this personalized puzzle online and completed the whole puzzle by himself (a big task for a non puzzle queen). After finishing it, he flipped it over and wrote a secret message that I wouldn’t see for months. (more…)

8 Myths about Waiting Until Your Wedding Night

/ Believing Lies, Christian Dating, Freedom From Sexual Sin & Shame, Love, Singleness & Dating / 11 Comments

You may think I’m crazy. You might think that what I’m about to say is not relevant in today’s world. Hear me out. In high school, I was not planning on waiting until marriage, I just hoped I found a guy I loved. This all changed when I fell in love with God. Now, I want to honor God and give Him all the glory in my current relationship, so I plan on waiting to have sex until my wedding night.

The Bible calls us to be pure and avoid sexual immorality. This is 100% different from the world, but remember that Jesus warns us that we will look different.

I’ve heard a few myths from readers and friends on why they don’t think a couple should wait until their wedding night to have sex. Let me share these myths with you and explain why I think they are myths. (more…)

Why Jesus Is More Satisfying than Dating

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As a 15 year old girl, I thought I loved him. He was the first boy I held hands with, my first kiss and my first boyfriend. As a high school girl, I dreamed of being together forever. Every night we would talk on the phone for hours, giggling about our days and never running out of things to talk about. He knew more about me than anyone else at that time, even to the point of being able to read my mind.

I was naive, but I was in love.

(more…)

Christian Dating: When My Body Doesn’t Know I’m a Christian

/ Christian Dating, Devotional, Freedom From Sexual Sin & Shame, Singleness & Dating, Surrender Life to Jesus / 19 Comments

Doesn’t my body know that I started to follow Jesus my freshman year of college? Yet, why does it constantly not follow Jesus? My mind. My heart. My body. All connected, and yet all do their own thing. Christian dating is hard. Setting physical boundaries is hard. You can only read so many devotionals, Christian blogs and Bible verses on purity before you begin to wonder, what am I doing wrong? Why is none of this controlling my body?

What do you do if you’ve set physical boundaries and you’re pursuing purity in dating, yet your body is doing its own thing?

Allow me to share my story, one of the many stories where my body acts differently from my heart and mind. Through my story and through Scripture, let’s learn together what to do when our bodies don’t know we are Christians. (more…)

Dating Is Not Fully Satisfying

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Yes, dating is amazing and fun. Yes I love it. But it’s not fully satisfying. We can’t live life hoping to find our satisfaction in our relationship status.

You’re single – you want to be dating. You’re dating – you want to be married. You’re married – you want kids. You have kids – you want more free time. You have free time – you want more to do.

Do you get what I’m saying?

I’ve met countless women in all stages of relationships and none have told me that the status she is in has left her fully satisfied. I have a married friend who has struggled with infertility. She tells me she often cries out to God in pain. Her husband tries to be there for her and comfort her, but she said his comfort is never enough. (more…)

Archive of ‘Christian Dating’ category

1. Your boyfriend may not be the only one who sees it.

How far can my boyfriend and I go physically before it becomes a sin?

I was naive, but I was in love.