Testimony: From Pornography Addiction to Redemption God uses our pain and our past to help others. Joy Skarka Skarka has struggled with promiscuity, pornography, masturbation, and sexual shame. She will share her story, and talk about the freedom we have in Christ.
Thank you Northwest Bible Church Recovery Ministry for having me! Here is their website for more info: https://www.northwestbible.org
As my now husband and I were dating, we felt shame for our sexual desires. We chose to avoid sex before marriage, but longed for “oneness.” No one told us this was normal, healthy even, and that God created us as sexual beings. The fact that we desired sex revealed that we were two healthy humans. Instead of praising God for our heathy bodies, we felt embarrassed for desiring something off limits.
Enter sexual shame into our relationship.
This was not the first time I experienced shame. I felt the need to hide my sexual desires as a young single woman. I felt shame after going too far with my high school boyfriend, and after my dad found a hickey on my neck, and after experiencing sexual abuse.
Many things can make us experience sexual shame. We feel sexual shame when… (more…)
Every 98 seconds, an American experiences sexual assault. Raped my freshman year of college, I joined the 321,500 victims (age 12 or older) who experience rape and sexual assault each year in the United States. As a victim of sexual abuse, I joined the many women who spoke out in the #MeToo movement.
After last October, when the #MeToo movement went viral, I posted on Facebook and Twitter. It felt empowering to think—others struggle too. This wasn’t the first time I posted online for the whole world to see about my abuse. I’m a blogger who often writes about my abuse. But for the first time, others joined me in speaking out. Friends I had known for years, speaking out for the first time. Friends I could connect with and share how Jesus had healed me from the emotional destruction of sexual abuse. However, #MeToo has created more than cathartic relief. (more…)
With a past filled with sexual abuse, promiscuity, and an unhealthy sex education, I lacked a healthy view of sexuality. The biggest lie that I believed was that I was sexually broken.
My view of sex was far from the truth that God promises in His love letter. I had two distorted and conflicting views of sex:
Five years ago I thought I would never heal from the rape I experienced my freshman year of college. My nights were filled with tears and my days were filled with doubts. Why did this happen? Does God allow rape? (Check out the answer to this question on Bible.com.)
With countless unanswered questions and tears in my eyes, I surrendered my life to Jesus. I still doubted that he could heal me, but I believed I needed a Savior. On my own, I would never find healing. My heart was a wreck and I needed Jesus to give me a new one.
Maybe you, just like me, often wonder, is healing even possible? How do I find healing? Could Jesus really heal me from the pain of sexual abuse? Let me share one important truth with you… (more…)
As a victim of rape, I thought the rape was my fault. I did not fully understand that I was experiencing the result of sin until years later. No matter the reason for the rape, it still wounded me deeply. Because of my hurt and pain, I often wondered why God would allow His children to suffer.
During the months following my abuse, God felt closer than ever before. He never moved. When I cried out in agony, He was by my side. When I prayed with tears streaming down my cheeks, He was there. When I begged Him to take away the pain, He held my hand.
He was there.
Right beside me, holding my hand, and helping me find healing. He was there and He knew this would happen…
Click to read my whole guest post on Bible.org.
I’ve been there. I was a college freshman who was lost searching for what would give me an identity. What would give me hope. What would make me feel loved. As a college student, one desires to fit in and find her place and to meet a guy.
At least, that is what I wanted. (more…)
My time in college was nothing like what I planned. I entered college thinking I was a Christian. I believed in God, but I didn’t know Him. I didn’t know His heart, His character or that He was the only one who could satisfy the longing in my heart to be loved.
Instead, I thought that hole in my heart could only be filled by a guy. (more…)
I’ll never forget how I felt the first time I looked into the mirror after being date raped. I stood there naked, alone and ashamed. I began to question God and his love for me. (more…)
As a woman who has been sexually abused, I’m thankful for men like Sam Eaton. Men that proclaim the message that we are not forgotten, not damaged and loved more than we can comprehend.
If this post touched your heart, make sure to send him a Tweet or Facebook message and thank him for his guest post. JP Ministries loves you Sam!
Love, Joy
I was insecure and made a lot of stupid jokes. It was a cold Iowa winter’s night, the type of night where normal people hibernate indoors. Not us. We were young and invincible as we made our way back from the sketchiest of bars. All you could see in the 2am sky was the cloud of smoke rising from the warm breath of our huddled, slightly intoxicated pack.
The group went their separate ways as I hung in the hallway with a girl I was proud to call my friend. As we stood chatting, somehow as a drunk guy and girl passed us in the hallway, an inexcusable joke escaped from my lips; a joke about rape. (more…)